Why MetaCars has Been Quiet The Past Month

Dear Friends,

I’m writing to explain why there haven’t been any posts on MetaCars in the past month. Rest assured, there will be in the future. It’s been a really weird course of events and now that I can finally explain everything to my loyal readers, I feel like I should. Click through to read the story.

Things at my day job haven’t been going well for a long time. I’m not sure exactly when it started, but after the economy totally blew up at the end of 2008, my company put all this pressure on me. I ended up working on projects that I really knew nothing about. No surprise that a lot of them turned out badly, but I refuse to say that it was all my fault. There were a lot of other team members, and besides, it was ridiculous to expect that anything I could do would be successful when the economy was so bad.

Then like a month ago things really took a turn for the worse. I went for a “meeting” at my boss’s office and she told me that she’s thinking about firing me (for reference the woman has got to be like 100, and hasn’t done any real work in years — maybe SHE should be the one leaving).

They were looking at two other guys to replace me, and they starting showing up and meeting people around the office and talking about what they’d do as if they were already hired. The worst part is that both of the guys were these little know-it-all twerps and much younger than me. Real slick used car salesman types. It was like I had to re-interview for my own job.

Everything went crazy with work. I was there all hours of the day and night trying to get my regular work done but also trying to convince the power that be to let me stay employed. I had to waste my time by going out to our regional offices to ‘demonstrate’ that I could do the work I’ve been doing all along.

A few times I actually was forced to have meetings with the two clowns they were looking at to replace me. I kid you not, I was even required to EXPLAIN myself and practically all the decisions I’ve ever made to my bosses and to these a**holes.  Then one of them went off on a rant about how badly I did something a few years ago. Having seen both of the two new guys’ resumes I can tell you that neither one of them has done anything worthwhile in terms of work. I heard that one of the guys got his current job because his rich mother pulled some strings with the local government. Wouldn’t surprise me if that was true.

As you might have guessed because I’m talking so freely about it, last Thursday I was fired. Fired from the job I had worked my ass off at for the past THREE years. And I worked as the head accountant and general right hand man for TEN YEARS to the guy who had my current job before me. So that’s it, like 13 years down the drain, fired. Oh, excuse me. I wasn’t fired. I was “asked to resign.” Luckily I have some good connections and I will be using them to try to get a new job pretty soon (preferably one that pays better too).

Until then, I will have plenty of time to work on MetaCars, so you can expect a lot of new posts.

Last I heard from friends still at the office, it looks like they’re going to let both of the young jerks co-do my old job. Whatever. Being Prime Minister of the UK is a shithouse job anyway.

Thanks for all your support and for reading MetaCars! Much more new content to come!

Sincerely,

Gordon Brown
Former Prime Minister of the United Kingdom
Editor-In-Chief, MetaCars.com

11 comments to Why MetaCars has Been Quiet The Past Month

  • The Truth About Car Blogs

    Dude, the microphone’s on…

  • Somebody

    I think any chances of you ever getting re-hired have been beaten down after this post.

    But anyways, good to hear you didn’t die or break your arms or anything like that.

  • eggwich

    Dude, you’re one of the funniest people on the internet. FOR SERIOUS. You’ll find a new gig soon. Wishing you the best of luck. Try Wales, those people are off the hook.

  • If you did, in fact, lose your job, you have my sympathy. I lost mine over two years ago and am still looking (construction industry). If you didn’t lose your job, that is a seriously funny post given who the author is proported to be. Keep you chin up and keep MetaCars alive. Thanks.

  • Think of this as an opportunity to revitalize MetaCars. You need to post an Awesomeness Manifesto.

  • Jordan-
    Sorry to hear about your job, the corporate world sucks ass. Whenever I get a big network TV show, I’ll hire you as a writer for sure. Until then, just prostitute yourself at night and make us laugh during the day. I hear there’s a market in male prostitution for short jews.

    one love
    m

  • and then I wrote Jordan and meant Gordon. What a fucking loser I am. my bad.

  • mgrinshpon

    Well, at least you got those 5 bucks from the GT-R commentary!

    Best of luck with the job hunt.

  • AlmightyPants

    Ahahahahaha. That’s one of the best bait and switches I’ve read in a long time. Loved it!

  • DrZombie

    Well done on the post. Looking forward to new ones.

  • eggwich

    post something new and jokey i’m paying good money to read this here bloggo goddammit goddammit!

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